Ten days ago, Anthony “The Mooch” Scaramucci was hired as the communications director for a constantly shifting White House staff. Earlier today, The Mooch was already fired from his new job in record time by President Donald John Trump (I only put his middle name in to increase the word count).
To make matters worse, his wife recently filed for divorce. While one can imagine he’ll at least get a handy in his car if he puts “I know the president” in his Tinder bio, it’s not a stretch to say The Mooch is a pretty unlucky man who just had the crappiest week in the history of crappy weeks. On top of that, he has a name that sounds like a fifth Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Poor guy.
It’s easy to point and laugh. All jokes aside, though, I feel bad for The Mooch. I feel your pain, Anthony, because I can relate: I can’t hold down a job for longer than 10 days either.
Like Scaramucci, I’m also an incompetent yet extremely cocky Italian man. And I’m not gonna sugarcoat it: it’s a rough life. I can’t keep a job for more than a few days, and it’s a disaster.
I was once fired from three different Burger Kings within one month. And it was this month. Even worse, I was once fired within 15 minutes of a new job at a Panera Bread for sneezing into the chicken noodle soup but still serving it to a customer because he was wearing a Slipknot shirt. I can’t even get a job driving for Uber since my car is just a cardboard box with soda cans for wheels. Sad!
So I feel your pain, Anthony. If you need a reference for a job as a Chick-fil-A cashier, I’ll hook you up..
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