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Genius Investment Bankers Are Giving Their Wives Year End Performance Bonuses

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Genius Investment Bankers Are Giving Wives Year End Performance Bonuses

It’s not every day that something this genius comes across your desk. It’s like when you see a new company or invention that you should have thought of years ago.

Some investment bankers on the Upper East Side having been giving their perma-slams year end bonuses based on their yearly performances in the home. The whole system was laid out in an article in the New York Times SundayReview section.

A wife bonus, I was told, might be hammered out in a pre-nup or post-nup, and distributed on the basis of not only how well her husband’s fund had done but her own performance — how well she managed the home budget, whether the kids got into a “good” school — the same way their husbands were rewarded at investment banks.

Do these “wife bonuses” actually exist? A quick poll among the finance folks would say that if they do, it’s not widespread.

It is a fantastic idea, overall. Think of the possibilities. There are so many things you can do with this to translate into your life with your girlfriend. Bribe your partner with something of value based on their sexual performance. Less than stellar blowjob? Sorry, I’m not buying your 2:00 a.m. pizza.

[via New York Times SundayReview]

Image via Shutterstock

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Harrison Lee

The Boulevard is a Content Manager for Grandex, Inc. He hates soccer and terrorists. He will forget more about sports than you will ever know in your lifetime.

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