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Here Are The Most Absurd, Hilarious Things Trump Said On “Howard Stern”

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Trump is crushing it right now. The dude whipped out his furry orange dick, slapped his opponents in the face with it, then planted it in the ground and used it pole-vault himself to the top of the game.

Anti-Trumpers are shocked. How could such a meanie bo-beanie earn the respect of America? We spent all this time pointing out all the mean things he says and it’s STILL not working! What do we do? I know! Let’s point out all the mean things he says!

BuzzFeed and CNN compiled a list of sexist, deplorable, and fucking hilarious things Trump has said during his dozens of interviews on “The Howard Stern Show.”

From Newser:

On pushing the Miss USA pageant in 2005: “If you’re looking for a rocket scientist, don’t tune in tonight, but if you’re looking for a really beautiful woman, you should watch.”

On Carmen Electra: “The boob job is terrible; they look like two light posts coming out of a body.”

On Desperate Housewives star Marcia Cross: “Would you go out with Marcia Cross or would you turn gay, Howard?”

Regarding the show’s Nicolette Sheridan, she’s a “solid four. I liked the way she used to look,” adding, “A person who is very flat-chested is very hard to be a 10.”

On his desire to have more kids: “I mean, I won’t do anything to take care of them. I’ll supply funds and [Melania will] take care of the kids.”

On his household help: “They’re not tens, I can tell you that. I’ve been very domesticated. It’s a sad event.”

On how women approach him: “They’ll walk up, and they’ll flip their top, and they’ll flip their panties.”

From BuzzFeed:

After buying the Miss USA pageant in 1997, Trump said he would get the “bathing suits to be smaller and the heels to be higher.”

Months after [Princess] Diana was killed in an automobile accident in 1997, Trump told Stern he thinks he could have slept with her, saying she had “supermodel beauty.” In a different interview in 2000, Trump said he would have slept with her “without hesitation” and that “she had the height, she had the beauty, she had the skin.” He added, “She was crazy, but these are minor details.”

In 2008, Trump said it would be difficult for him to get an erection for Madonna.

[On fighting Rosie O’Donnell]: “I think it’d be pretty close — if she ever fell in the wrong direction I wouldn’t have a chance,” said Trump in the late 2007 interview.

I can’t believe Trump said these things. On “Howard Stern” of all places!

Well done, CNN and BuzzFeed. My opinion of Trump has definitely shifted thanks to your hard work. I like him more than ever.

Image via YouTube

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Alex Buscemi

AKA Boosh. Former high school back-up wide receiver. Author of two pretty successful Reddit comments. Recent grad from the University of South Carolina.

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