The greatest day in our greatest of nations is upon us, folks. As you celebrate your country’s independence (and the sperm of the men who brought you to this point), it is important to remember what matters most.
Partying your nuts off.
Memorial Day is a day of solemn remembrance. Flag day is a day of… flags. Independence Day? That’s a day to blow shit up, eat a bunch of meat, and drink so much that you believe that you’re actually George Washington crossing the Delaware and not a man-child fording a kiddie pool in your undies.
You need only a few things to set your 4th party off right. The aforementioned meats and booze are a given, and explosives are available anywhere they accept Bitcoin or American Express. The final pieces in your patriotic puzzles are jams so tasty that they won’t make you think twice about banging that questionable girl just because she’s wearing a red, white, and blue romper.
These are curated bangers. Not in the way hipsters curate soap carvings from death row inmates, but in the way that every single one of these songs is intended to make you feel in touch with your nation as you fingerblast someone at 3 a.m. in a Waffle House bathroom. These tunes either reference the country, are country, or will get you so hyped that the next time you bleed, your blood cells will be red, white, and dark blue. In case of the third, see a doctor.
Furthermore, all artists on this list are American except for one (I had to include “The Body Of An American” because The Wire is the greatest series ever made, plus the Irish have done their fair share for our culture). With that being said, let the eagle fly as you crack brew after brew and engage with a playlist that will elevate your independence from Taft fat to Reagan PHAT.
Do it for your country and, as always, don’t drink and drive..