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Love The President Of Venezuela Threatening To Jail Factory Owners Over Beer Shortage

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This is what true leadership is about: holding people accountable and setting precedence that not delivering on a commitment will have serious consequences. That’s what my boy Nicolas Maduro is doing down in Venezuela. After a booze shortage was caused by one of the country’s largest beer distributors shutting down a plant, big dick Nick wants justice for his alcohol-starved citizens.

From Fortune:

Last month [Venezuela’s] largest food and beverage distributor, Empresas Polar, shut down its last operating beer plant. It says it has been unable to access hard currency to buy raw materials.

President Nicolas Maduro threatened Saturday to take over idle factories and jail their owners following a decree granting him expanded powers to act in the face of a deep economic crisis.

I’m not entirely up to date on my Venezuelan current events, but I’m going to safely assume this dude is a democratic “President” the same way the girl at the bar you just bought a shot for has “a boyfriend” or “isn’t into guys.” Everyone knows you’re a power hungry dictator, but you never want to actually drop that hard D bomb. It doesn’t hit the ears quite right. Regardless, he probably isn’t a fan favorite amongst his people. There’s probably talk of revolución and overthrowing this giant mustachioed teddy bear.

How do you gain some easy points in your approval ratings? Simple. Find a common enemy and go after the the people that are currently causing your country to lack proper amounts of party product. Get the spotlight off all the awful shit you may or may not have done and shine it on the people who are truly tearing down your country: the sobriety stimulating assholes at the beer factory.

Savvy move by Nicky Six Pack. Get more brew on the streets and residents will forget they live in a shitty, tyrant-run, oppressive country like Venezuela after continually drinking themselves numb. But if there’s a shortage of booze, you’re essentially ruling on borrowed time. He needs to #MakeVenezuelaDrunkAgain and do so in swift fashion.

[via Fortune]

Image via Youtube

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Dan Regester

Dan Regester @Dan_Regester is a Senior Writer, Podcast Host, and Video Guy for Grandex Media. He's Delco trash to the core and a UCF cinema studies graduate because he never got around to applying to an actual film school. Dan is a gambling man, crypto investor, and procrastinator. He enjoys long walks to the water fountain between bench press sets and is not a fan of the homeless, the elderly, or the Phoenix Airport. Email tips to

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