One of the world’s most notoriously mediocre bourbons just got a little bit sweeter, and it has nothing to do with the formula.
The legendary “once-did-a-ridiculously-hot-lesbian-scene-with-Natalie-Portman” actress Mila Kunis has just been named as a new spokesperson for Jim Beam. I never thought Meg from “Family Guy” would inspire me to buy shitty bourbon, but you better believe the next time I make my way to the liquor store (read: this afternoon) I’ll purchase a handle of that notorious Kentucky devil juice–even if it only increases my odds of having sex with her by .001 percent.
Considering Kid Rock was the last Jim Beam spokesperson I can think of, it’s safe to say hiring Kunis is a huge improvement. To be fair though, a middle-aged balding man with scabies would have been an improvement over the white trash, crusty-headed, “Sweet Home Alabama”-stealing icon of pure filth known as Kid Rock.
I know what you guys came here for, and I’m here to deliver. Here’s Kunis selling you bourbon and looking sexier than any human being should.