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Last year, then University of Missouri freshman Kevin Waida was having the time of his life. He was finishing up his freshman year of college, partying as hard as someone can (not very) in the dorms, and secretly hoarding a king’s ransom’s worth of stolen panties. Yes, Kevin Waida was a panty thief. But isn’t that everyone’s freshman year? Full of innocent fun and sexually based legal offenses? No? Sorry Kev.
Not only did Waida’s freshman year end on a uniquely creepy note, but it was an excessively creepy one. According to initial reports Waida had stolen up to 200 pairs of panties from his dorm, Hatch Hall. That is determined, creepy, and obsessive. If anyone starts finding dead cats in Waida’s current neighborhood please alert the authorities. But really, dude was snagging more panties than the Underpants Gnomes.
I assume Waida’s step two was “masturbate endlessly.” Waida was eventually arrested for his sexdemeanor, I like to imagine by SVU’s Detective Stabler, and held at Boone County Jail until posting a $1,500 bond. He was charged with stealing and stalking. On November 7th Waida was finally sentenced.
Sophomore Kevin Waida pled guilty to misdemeanor stealing for the May incident, according to court documents. Judge Michael Bradley sentenced Waida to two years of unsupervised probation, during which Waida must report any arrests or summons within 48 hours.
Seems like a pretty light sentence, though I’m sure Waida had a clean record prior to making several hundred cotton and lace deposits into his spank bank. Now though, he’s a dirty, dirty boy.
(*shudders, runs home to take shower*)
God help this kid if he ever upgrades to stealing used vibrators.