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If I ever had to return a kickoff in the NFL, there is a 100 percent chance the ball bonks right off my head in what would look something like this.
Because I’d be filling my spandex pants up with diarrhea the entirety of the time I was out on the field if I were to be tasked with returning a kick, there’s no way in hell I’d have the presence of mind to use the loophole Green Bay Packers return man Ty Montgomery used against the Lions on Sunday if a ball were to be kicked close to the sideline three yards from the endzone. Granted I didn’t even know such a loophole existed until I saw this play, but even if I did, I’d be so happy the ball wasn’t kicked to me in the air that I’d have taken a knee before leaving a poop trail straight from the 3 yard mark to the bench, leaving my team with awful field position.
The whole deal is that a kickoff is considered out of bounds, and thus taken to the 40 yard line, if the player who receives it is out of bounds — even if the ball itself is firmly planted in play.
That’s just heads up football. People who are calling Montgomery a shyster are the same people who think intentional walks in baseball take away from “the sport of it.” This country was built on loopholes. Namely the worst parts of our country, like the housing market crash and us being left with two oafs running for president because of the two party system, but still — loopholes are as USA as it gets. Football needs more of this..
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