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Floods Reported In Happy Valley After Sororities Got Wind Of Penn State Lambda Chi’s Adorable Frat Goat

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Not every fraternity is large enough, fortunate enough, or responsible enough to be afforded the opportunity to collectively care for a frat animal. My fraternity was the frat hound type back in the day, but we never got a new dog after ol’ Nixon jumped off the Snark Deck back in the late ’80s (Dorn has a similar story from his fraternity). We have a railing up there now, but I think the chapter as a personified entity still hasn’t recovered from the emotional trauma enough to move onto the next pupper yet.

Lucky for Penn State Lambda Chi Alpha, they possess all the skills and qualities necessary to foster a frat animal, so foster they did. They chose a frat goat, and named her Bella Russe.

My new home isn't that BAAAAAAAAD #PSUGoat

A photo posted by Bella Russe (@psugoat) on

It's an life out here for a GOAT #PSUGoat

A photo posted by Bella Russe (@psugoat) on

Protecting the streets 👀 🐐 🚔

A photo posted by Bella Russe 🐐 (@psugoat) on

My uncles love me

A photo posted by Bella Russe 🐐 (@psugoat) on

Happy Valentine's Day Yo 😘

A photo posted by Bella Russe 🐐 (@psugoat) on

When your favorite song comes on 🐐

A video posted by Bella Russe 🐐 (@psugoat) on

New friends on the block 🐐🐱#PSUGOAT

A video posted by Bella Russe 🐐 (@psugoat) on

I’ve been trying to figure out how they came up with the name “Bella Russe,” and I’m having some trouble doing so. Does the fraternity have ties to the country Belarus? That seems more logical than my second guess, that the fraternity has ties to Bella Russe, a cosmetics store in Trinidad & Tobago that goes hard on Facetune.

Kat Von D Lolita liquid lipstick- TT$200

A photo posted by Bella Russe 💄 (@bellarussestore) on

Appreciate Bella Russe while you have her, you guys. Because, in the blink of an eye, your frat goat can be tragically taken away from you and sent on up to frat goat heaven. R.I.P. Ranger.

Hopefully Penn State Lambda Chi isn’t subjected to the same state-sponsored anti-goat terrorism that South Carolina’s TKE chapter was.

[via Instagram]

Image via Instagram

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Jared Borislow

Jared Borislow (né The DeVry Guy) is a Senior Writer for Grandex Inc and a 2015 graduate of the University of Wisconsin.

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