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The New Miss America Is A Current Arkansas Kappa Kappa Gamma

Shoutout to Savvy Shields, a 21-year-old art major (sup, haters) and Kappa Kappa Gamma sister at the University of Arkansas for winning the 2017 Miss America title.

What a week for the Razorbacks. This talented little lady out of Fayetteville took home the crown on Sunday in Atlantic City. Wait. They’re subjecting the women that are supposed to be the cream of the crop of this country in the post nuclear fallout penny slot purgatory that is Atlantic City? Jesus. Step it it up, pageant organizers. Instead of surrounding them with middle-aged divorcees carrying around colostomy bags in bootleg Vegas, put the event literally anywhere else. Atlantic City makes Detroit and Cleveland look charming by comparison.

How about this tweet from Savvy’s high school ex?

It’s all good, player. Just chalk it up as another notch on the ol’ belt. You got to do hand stuff with a future Miss America. Not saying you SHOULD put that on your résumé for future employment, but it might not hurt.

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Dan Regester

Dan Regester @Dan_Regester is a Senior Writer and Video Guy for Grandex Media. Delco trash. UCF alum. Famous FIJI on Wikipedia. Bit of a gambling problem. Advocate of shipping the homeless to Mars. Email tips to Dan@totalfratmove.com

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