Mailman Dave
“Hasta la vista, baby” or “If it bleeds, we can kill it” I feel would be one of the first things that Arnold would say to the Aliens, and we would then be fucked. Those little green assholes would shove a prove so far up our ass after they killed Arnold.
A poll of over 2000 British adults voted that Arnold would be the best person to represent the world if Aliens invaded. First of all, not even people who speak English can truly understand him, and second, is he really the best choice? Other celebrities that were included were Will Smith, who finished second in the poll. At least Will Smith has acted in an alien invasion movie. Arnold has battled robots, clones, and Predators. I know technically, the Predator is an extraterrestrial, but I don’t think of those movies as an alien invasion. There is an entire movie called Aliens vs. Predator. Will Smith took down an entire alien invasion in Independence Day.
Other celebrities that were included in the poll were Tom Cruise, Harrison Ford, and Gillian Anderson. All old ass people, if there’s going to be an alien invasion, shouldn’t we have somebody who isn’t so old that they think they just have dementia, and there are no actual aliens there. I want to believe that there are younger celebrities who could do a better job, but thinking of Kanye interacting with an alien invasion scares me.
My first reaction would be to pick a current sports player. Think about it you have Aaron Donald walk up to those aliens, and they see the size of him, and are immediately intimidated. The aliens don’t need to know that most humans are a fat sack of shit, and don’t have muscles stacked on top of themselves.
I think it’s safe to say that regardless of who we send out that the aliens would kick our ass, and we would be shit out of luck. The poll had former president Donald Trump in 8th place and current President Biden in the last place. Him struggling to walk up Air Force One’s steps isn’t the best look for him fighting off an alien invasion.
