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The Gainesville Urinator Is Still On The Loose, Hilarious Police Sketch Released

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The reports are starting to add up in Gainesville as more and more women are contacting the Gainesville Police Department regarding a serial urinator running around the University of Florida campus.

We first reported on this story a couple weeks ago. When the story was first published, only four women had come forward to complain about receiving involuntary golden showers. Since then, three more women have come forward, pissed off about being pissed on.

One of the victims was able to remember enough details about the fugitive pisser to help police create one of the most generic composite drawings of a black man I have ever seen.

Police described the suspect as black male between the ages of 25 and 30. He stands around six feet tall and has a medium to chunky build and was wearing a dark hooded sweatshirt with baggy jeans during the latest incident.

Hopefully, the delinquent will soon realize that it’s not difficult to attract a girl if you don’t pee on them first.

If you’d like to put to rest the fears of the beautiful women of Gainesville and have information that could lead to the arrest of the suspect, please call the Gainesville Police Department (352-955-1818), or CrimeStoppers (352-372-7867) if you wish to remain anonymous .

[via News 4 Jax]

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Bogey Wells

Bogey Wells is a Senior Freelance Writer for TFM News and a former summer pledge intern at TFMHQ. His Spotify playlists are pure garbage. Email:

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