======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
Today is Throwback Thursday, and this is the greatest movie scene of all time:
Let’s break this down…
Colleen, a hot babe, is jogging down the beach with a dude wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a blue banana-hammock speedo. He is carrying a frisbee and rocking a satchel. They stop when they come across an armed guard standing near the tree line wearing a button-down and khakis. Colleen peels off her shirt to reveal her chest cannons.
The guard addresses her, “Hey Colleen, who’s that turkey with you?” Colleen informs the guard, “He’s just a thrower.” The guard has some bad news for The Thrower: “Sorry buster, you ain’t allowed here. Take off.” Oh snap.
That’s when shit starts to get real. “Hey lighten up, we’re just throwing,” says The Thrower. But the guard isn’t buying it. He doesn’t think The Thrower can throw, and says, “Oh yeah? Let’s see you throw one.”
He tosses the frisbee to the guard, who snatches it with both hands and then pulls a one-hand-up-and-under-the-leg-catch-with-the-same-hand move before chunking it back. They go back and forth one more time, and then the guard thinks, “I’ve got to set down my giant fucking Uzi to show this poser how it’s done.”
The Thrower seizes this opportunity to tell Colleen to fuck off so he can get down to business. When she resists he flashes his satchel pistol and tosses the frisbee down the beach so she’ll fetch it like a dog. That’s when he catches a glimpse of her backside.
“Hey Colleen. You’ve got a great ass,” says The Thrower.
“So do you pilgrim,” Colleen flirts back.
Then it’s time to do frisbee battle.
“You don’t look so hot to me,” The Thrower says to the guard as he pulls a backup black frisbee from his satchel and tosses it.
“Oh yeah? See if you can catch this,” says the guard.
The Thrower does catch it, and then switches it out with yet another frisbee from his satchel that has razor blades jutting out all over.
The next thing you know there’s a slow motion frisbee throw that goes straight through the fingers of the guard and into his neck, blood shoots everywhere while he lets out loud dying groaning noises, and BAM…it’s the greatest movie scene of all time.
I will personally be watching Hard Ticket to Hawaii in its entirety this weekend.