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The War On Freedom

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The War On Freedom

Dear concerned citizens,

We are at war, my friends. These are historically important times that we are living in. The balance of power is shifting, and you and I are right in the middle of the crosshairs.

I’m not talking about Iraq, Afghanistan, terrorism, or drugs. Those are Hollywood marionettes designed to boost the bottom line. Those “wars” are all about ratings. I’m not talking about an overseas power grab or some abstract fear-inducing concept. I’m talking about a war happening right here on our front steps. I’m talking about the war on American freedom.

You didn’t know there was a war? Oh, you must not be reading the headlines. Mass murderers are shooting the shit out of everybody in sight with “assault weapons,” and there’s a big push to ban them and enact stricter gun laws. If you haven’t read my previous article on the misinformation of gun control, read it HERE before you continue. Gun control is a proven failure, and it does not address the real problems.

The tragedy inflicted by psychopaths is an unfortunate symptom of a much larger problem, and gun laws are not the solution. Don’t just take it from me. Take it from the father of a 6-year-old massacred at Sandy Hook elementary school.

Gun control doesn’t protect people, it makes them more vulnerable. Look at the facts and do your own research. You’ve got to see the bigger picture. You’ve got to understand why the government wants gun control. They want gun control because they are afraid of armed, freethinking citizens.

Most people take freedom for granted. People forget that America is an unprecedented, revolutionary experiment. We are the only people in the history of the world that have the right to bear arms. In all other nations, if gun ownership is even allowed, it is a privilege, not a right. The government can disarm the people whenever they want. The 2nd amendment shines alone under the shadow of state violence and tyranny.

Guns are part of our culture…part of our identity. We were born in the blood of a violent revolution. We killed for our freedom and the founding fathers weren’t stupid. They were smart motherfuckers. Even when they overthrew the British Empire, they knew that tyranny would inevitably return in one form or another. It always does and it always will.

That’s why they included the 2nd amendment. It wasn’t to ensure that we could go hunting. It’s there to grant the people the God-given right to overthrow oppressive forces, both foreign and domestic. The right of revolution is implicit in the 2nd amendment.

Revolution isn’t a one-night stand with a slam you never call back. It’s the frat mattress that gets tossed back and forth between brothers of all houses. Revolutions are just like seasons. They’re either coming or they just left, but they’re always on the way. Even in the coldest of winter, spring is implied. That’s the way things are. It’s a natural cycle. The formula for human civilization is the same as the formula for ex-girlfriends. Tyranny, revolution, freedom, repeat.

The reason we have a high degree of freedom compared to other nations is because we have a heavily armed populace. With enough organization, the American public could easily overthrow the government. There are over 310 million privately owned guns in America. We’ve got more guns than most world militaries combined. We’re the biggest armed force on the planet.

That’s the only reason we have any rights at all. Thanks to the Patriot Act and the NDAA, our constitutional rights have been raped beyond recognition. We don’t even technically have rights anymore. They’re purely symbolic. Any sort of dissent is now called “domestic terrorism,” and once you’re labeled a terrorist, you’re completely fucked. Black bag-over-the-head Gestapo shit is now perfectly legal without a warrant, without a trial, and without a single fuck given.

Now I’m not saying that we should start a revolution or overthrow the government. That would be counterproductive. That’s also treason, and I love my country. (Dear NSA agent who is reading this article because it set off 50,000 red flags, I am a comedian who writes fiction in order to buy booze. Please don’t send me to summer camp in Cuba.)

What I’m saying is that revolutions don’t have to be violent. A truly free society can change a government with words and ideas. The power of the mind infinitely exceeds the power of the gun, but only when there is freedom. It’s hard to talk about radical ideas when you’re body is full of bullet holes.

Privately owned guns are a necessary safeguard of free expression. Guns ensure that we have a fair dialogue with those who rule over us. The government knows that if they try too much fascist bullshit, there will be an armed revolution. A good government is afraid of its citizens, not the other way around.

Civilian guns are the ultimate checks and balances on power. Fuck congress and fuck the Supreme Court. At the end of the day, it boils down to the fact that an armed population is difficult to enslave.

There is a war going on right now. It’s not a war against terrorism, drugs, or bad guys, it’s a war against freedom. Taking away guns is the final step in the realization of a total police state. Banning assault weapons is a baby step towards a New World Order’s wet dream. The first amendment only exists because of the second amendment. If they take away our guns, then what are you going to do? Talk about tyranny?

Talking about tyranny is terrorism.

Fuck you, citizen.

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RageTheory (@RageTheory) is a contributing writer for Total Frat Move. He enjoys long walks of whiskey and sodomy on the beach.

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