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I can’t imagine anyone who lives in Hawaii looks forward to leaving their pretty much perfect tropical paradise to make the trek to anywhere in the contiguous United States.
When you’re a college kid going to school in Hawaii, priorities can be just a little bit different, though. You’re not looking to spend all your time living the easy island life with a fruity drink in one hand and a pork-and-pineapple kebab in the other; you want to mix it up a bit and experience the seedier side of things. And no place offers a more lush cornucopia of debauchery than the Big Sleazy itself: New Orleans.
So, when one Hawaii baseball player was asked late last week about his team’s upcoming three-game away series against LSU, his attention seemed to be pretty focused on the post-game festivities and taking that hour-and-a-half Uber ride with his teammates for some Bourbon Street shenanigans.
While there’s no way to tell for sure just how lit things got for Hawaii baseball, the series recap paints a pretty telling picture.
On Friday, Hawaii beat LSU 4-2. An outcome worthy of a responsible celebration, since Hawaii is unranked and LSU was ranked #13 at the time. But when you’re a college kid on Bourbon Street, it’s pretty much impossible to rage responsibly. So a few dozen Hurricanes and lap dances at Larry Flynt’s Hustler Club later and these kids probably didn’t roll into their Baton Rouge hotel until the wee hours of the morning.
Next comes their Saturday game with a 2:30 p.m. start time. Just enough but not too much time for the kids to do whatever they needed to do to chase away any lingering hangovers. The second game spelled a 5-1 loss for Hawaii, which was a more realistic outcome considering the matchup. Now the series was tied 1-1 with the tie-breaking game starting at a brutal 10:30 a.m. on Sunday. The kids were probably given explicit instructions to take it easy before that one, but it was their last night to party balls, and they probably snuck off to Bourbon Street for round two.
Sunday morning rolls around and that’s when things got messy. Let’s just say the Bourbon Street hangover definitely showed up for this one: Hawaii got crushed 14-1. Their starting pitcher gave up six hits and four runs in only two innings. Someone probably should have cut him off after his 10th hand grenade.
Something tells me that the trip back to Hawaii had the Rainbow Warriors squad feeling like all of NOLA’s Mardi Gras beads: in the gutter..
Image via Twitter/@BrandonSaho