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While individual levels of intended intoxication may vary, drinking during any one of these occurrences is bound to get you to your desired state, most likely in a very quick manner.
Take a drink when:
- A wide receiver throws his hands up, crying for a pass interference call. Drink twice if a late flag comes in and he actually gets it.
- Someone mentions Peyton Manning’s “elder status.”
- Phil Simms praises Manning. Drink twice if he uses the word “elite” in that sentence.
- Cam “dabs.” Drink twice if it pisses you off.
- They show a replay using “pylon cam.” Drink twice if the pylon gets knocked over.
- Manning shouts “Omaha.”
- Every time Peyton throws a pass that wobbles. Drink twice if he manages to complete it.
- Brock Osweiler is described as being “the future” of the Broncos.
- Cam hands a ball to a kid.
- There is a slightly inappropriate “Go Daddy” commercial.
- Peyton’s forehead is visible. Drink twice if this is accompanied by “the Manning face.”
- Visible lip syncing occurs during the halftime show.
- Someone tells you to shut up so they can hear a commercial.
- The phrase “indisputable video evidence” is used.
- Someone who doesn’t know football asks a question about the game.
- Peyton Manning appears in a Papa John’s commercial.
- They show an old picture of Elway and/or compare Manning and Elway’s stats.
- The phrase “Hall of Fame Career” is used.
- A Budweiser commercial is shown with a Clydesdale in it. Drink twice if there is also a puppy shown.
- Coldplay performs the song “Yellow” at halftime.
- Every time a player disagrees with a penalty called on him.
- The camera focuses on Cam’s cleats in warmups.
- The camera shows Eli in the crowd.
- The words to the National Anthem are forgotten.
- They go to commercial with a cutaway scene of the Golden Gate Bridge.
- A commercial with animals comes on. Remain chugging for the entirety of the commercial.
- They bring in a rules analyst to comment on a questionable call. Chug twice if he ends up getting it wrong.
- There is a halftime show malfunction.
- At any point in the game they make reference to the long-lost Manning brother, Cooper.
- Every time a Bud Light Commercial comes on.
- The Patriots are mentioned.
- Thomas Davis’s broken arm or Jared Allen’s broken foot is used as an excuse as to why they could not make a tackle..