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As a Duke hater, my nightmares have occurred right in front of my eyes, and I’m stuck helplessly watching. I feel like a nine-year-old kid that snuck watching a Stephen King movie, except instead of a murderous clown, I see a man with a pronounced nose and jet-black hair cutting down nets on his way to ANOTHER Final Four. UNC, for the love of God, America needs you. I know that Duke has Paolo and the movie script is theirs to finish, but UNC’s offense has been clicking- they also beat Duke at Cameron. The Tar Heels currently have a +46 rebounding differential for the tournament. They hit thirty-four threes in the tournament coming into a game where they eviscerated Saint Peters, and Brady Manek is a damn problem (fear the beard).
Being that this is the first time these two titans have clashed in the Final Four, this will be the best college basketball game in years. Everybody who isn’t a weirdo that covers themself in blue body paint and treats Lex Fridman’s podcast like an erotic experience is rooting for UNC. Duke is shooting fifty-five percent from the field; however, North Carolina has more length than a certain picture of a bald guy passed around through quarantine. Take the Tar Heels, and keep your fingers crossed. Duke haters, come one, come all.