Hallelujah, the NFL is BACK: Season Opener Betting Guide

The NFL is back BABY!

Jesus Christ, at long last. What a great time of year. 

I missed the feeling of being dangerously stressed on a Sunday afternoon.

I almost lathered myself in honey and spent a Saturday night in bear country woods, just so that I could wake up the next morning and feel something.


Thankfully, I don’t have to do that, not anymore at least. The season kicks off with a Thursday Night Spectacle featuring the Tampa Bay Bucs, the defending Super Bowl Champions, hosting the Dallas Cowboys. 

So the game spread is a bit steep. It currently lists the Bucs as 9.5 point favorites. Yes, it’s Brady on opening night…at home. Yes, Mike McCarthy, the coach of the Dallas Cowboys, could be, quite frankly, the most foolish coach in the NFL. Yes, the Bucs are stacked. Beyond stacked. 

But 9.5 points is something of a mockery. In fact, I would go so far to say this might be a trap. The Bucs will win, but I bet you Dak leads Dallas late in the game for a sneaky backdoor cover. Give me the Bucs’ moneyline, but I’ll take Dallas against the spread.

I know that the Bucs are stoked to return pretty much their entire defensive roster of studs, but I don’t think this will be a defensive showcase by any means. I smell a high scoring game on both sides. The current point total is 51.5… I’m hammering that over. 

Here’s how I think this game will go. I predict the Bucs strike first, and then second… and then quite possibly third. The Bucs may have a three score lead over the Cowboys in the first half, but I foresee them getting complacent and letting sneaky Dak back into the game to make all the Bucs ML takers sweat.

That’s my in depth analysis of the game. If you want to make some serious cash, here’s your ticket.

If you don’t trust me, no problem. We don’t know each other like that. Not yet at least.

No sweat.

Besides, there’s still a golden opportunity for you to make some big bucks with practically zero risk.

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Like I said, it’s a real nice time of year.


Written by Henry Marken

I lost my pinky finger at age 4, but then found it again at a soup kitchen when I was 15. Survivor of a wild turkey attack (2008). I went to the University of Phoenix before it was cool to do college online. Currently in a lawsuit with Crayola after a devastating purple crayon incident.

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