In the middle of deciding what to write about, my father texted me and asked for fantasy football advice. If I’m going to help him with his problems, he’s going to help me with mine. I asked him for a blog idea. It wasn’t particularly helpful, but since I’m experienced at making the best of his many flaws, I decided to spin it. I sent many people the following text: “Could you give me an idea for a blog. Don’t overthink it, it can be anything, there are literally no wrong answers.” Here are the results:
“You could come up with the best or most creative movie references or something like that.” I could do that, but it would require hard work. You’re the one doing that today, pal.
“Have you covered Travis and Taylor at all yet?” Yes mom, and so has every other media company in the world. But thank you and I’m sorry I don’t call you more.
“Yesterday a dude in NJ drove his car into a police station while blasting Welcome to the Jungle full blast and is facing up to life in prison.” I laughed so unbelievably hard at that, and a little harder at the video. It might be a little too dark for me to hit my word minimum about it without seeming like a psychopath. Either way, “Welcome to the Jungle” makes him feel like a bad movie villain. Also, no one was hurt.
Loser didn’t answer her phone. She admittedly did text me out of the blue several weeks ago with this idea though. Shout out to her for that one.
Responded with this link. This video gave me a really good chuckle. I don’t understand fashion, or fashion shows. But I think this woman dressing like a puffle from Club Penguin and stumbling over Sam Smith as a result is really funny. If they blindfold all of the models maybe it becomes a sport?
“Awkward moments at a physical.” I officially reserve the right to use any of these in the future, because that one is awesome. There’s obviously the turn your head and cough moment, but there is way more. Standing on the scale, lying about your drug use, exaggerating your sex life to a doctor. The list goes on. This might be the winner of the list.
“Your father, please write an article on him.” My father is admittedly quite the character, but I’m not sure if people are interested in the tattooed, recovering addict, die-hard Eagles fan who once laughed at me when I told him my friend called me a bag of milk.
“How NOT to come into Philadelphia for a playoff sport.” I knew this guy was going to say something about the Phillies. He’s potentially the biggest sports fan I know. This one could definitely work.