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Five Celebrities I’d Be Afraid to Talk To

I consider myself to be somewhat of a conversational O negative blood. I think of myself as a universal conversationalist. Despite this, I have a tendency to freeze up whenever I’m talking to an attractive girl. The last girl I hooked up with asked me, “Should I stay or go?” as I blankly stared at her thinking of what to say. Due to this crippling social flaw of mine, these are the five celebrities I’d be afraid to talk to.

Livvy Dunne

Livvy Dunne seems like she is the most charming person ever. I think she would talk to me as if I were a Make a Wish kid who she met for a PR opportunity. She currently dates the best pitching prospect in baseball, and I would simply know that I couldn’t compete with him. More than anything though, I think I would truly start hyperventilating if I were ever in a room with someone that attractive.

Alexandra Daddario

The explanation for this one is pretty simple. I would imagine her famous True Detective scene for 100 percent of the time that I were in the same place as her. I would be so mentally locked in on it I wouldn’t even know if someone started talking to me. 

Sofia Vergara

I started watching Modern Family way too young to have a healthy Sofia Vergara fandom. Realistically, my love for Sofia Vergara would be better described as an obsession. I would break down in tears if she ever gave me a hug.

Emily Ratajkowski

She is potentially the most beautiful thing on the planet. Not that she is “thing,” but that she is simply more attractive than every other man, woman, and perfectly-cooked steak on the planet. If someone introduced the two of us, I would probably start shouting, “iCarly,” until she acknowledged that she was on that show or left.

Bryce Harper

Ok he made this list for different reasons. That being said, if I met Bryce Harper, I would need a two-minute adjustment period, followed by a chunk of time dedicated for me to reenact his NLCS Game Six homerun. Honestly, it’s probably better if we just don’t meet.

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Written by TFM

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