Florida [wo]Man Strikes Again

Of course, it was a Florida woman…

A recent prison visit when awry when it was discovered that a 44-year-old woman who showed up to the prison on a visit with a child had a shit ton of drugs on and with her.

When she was checking into the jail she was searched, as is custom before a prison visit. Everyone knows this. During the search, guards found 3.5 ounces of a drug (I’m not sure which one) and proceeded to arrest the woman.

After the arrest, they brought a drug dog out to check the woman’s car for more substances. The drug dog, named Liberty, (narc) found 687 more grams of coke and heroin. That’s over 24 ounces. Wow.

The woman’s poor kid was turned over to the Florida Department of Children and Families, and the criminal mastermind extraordinaire lady was charged with trafficking in heroin and cocaine, the introduction of contraband into a correctional facility, child abuse/neglect, and possession of drug paraphernalia.

It’s like she wasn’t even trying to be slick while attempting to smuggle what I’m sure is a lot of money worth of drugs into a fvcking PRISON. Looks like we have an early frontrunner for dumbass of the year.

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Written by Ben Mulry

Masshole. Division 1 (intramural) College Athlete. Correct Take Haver.

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