Crocs Suck, But Making ‘Luxury Crocs’ Sucks Even More

Yes, the title is true; we legally cannot lie to you. We are partnered with DraftKings to bring you this incredible new user offer that ends very soon!

Claim this offer using DraftKings:

  1. Sign up for DraftKings by clicking here
  2. Deposit $5 or more into your account
  3. Finally, place a $5 moneyline bet & get $150 in bonus bets ! (New users only)
Note* Want to bet on another game/sport? No problem – you’ll still get your $150 in bonus bets!*
Screen Shot 2021-10-17 at 11.04.09 AM

If you are working in the back of the house at a restaurant then I can accept your decision to wear crocs. If you are doing literally anything else, there is no reason for these abominations to be on your feet.

They were fvcking awful when they first came out. They are fvcking awful to this day.

Now that we have established a baseline… there are those among us who think that just having to decide if they should have their crocs in sport mode or not is not enough… that they need to have custom, luxury crocs.

That isn’t a thing.

I should not have to explain this.

However, here we are.

Zara has released a pair of crocs with faux fur on them.
WHY?
I don’t know.

What I do know is that if you buy these you are the fvcking worst.

Let’s go to the tape:

You are an absolute asshole if you have these on your feet.

Again, for comfort while working in a kitchen… Crocs are good.

For literally any other reason, you should simply do better and not embarrass yourself.

If you think spending any amount of money on this — and having the detachable fake fur — then we are not the same. You are the worst.

21+. Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. T&Cs apply.

Back to Top