Ozzy Osbourne Helps Cement My Belief That NFTs Are Fvcking Stupid

This will be the second article in two weeks that I start like this:

I love crypto. I hate NFTs. Honestly, I think they are a massive scam.

The first was because a dude lost $200,000 on ONE NFT transaction because of a typo and was just like… NBD, moving along.

This time it is because Ozzy Osbourne is just creating 9,666 NFT bats and selling them. It is brainless that people are thinking these will hold up and have any actual value in any meaningful timeframe. It is digital beanie babies.

Each of the bats will be called Cryptobatz, and supposedly has been ‘uniquely designed from the mind of Osbourne and NFT creator Sutter Systems’ … but considering Ozzy’s brain is pudding, it is clearly just a way to slap his name on something and take advantage of idiots buying this stuff.

Obviously, the prince of darkness chose to use bats as his NFT initiation because way back when he stuck a bat in his mouth and bit its head off on stage. It is probably the most famous thing he has done … seriously, name 10 Ozzy or Black Sabbath songs…

His NFT bats aren’t biteable, but according to the distributor website they will have the one-time ability to bite back at other NFTs.

“Every Cryptobat holds an innovative power … the ability to ‘bite’ and NFT from a different blue chip project and create a ‘mutantbat’ that shares the DNA of both tokens,” the website says. 

So, so so so so stupid.

If you don’t know, an NFT, or nonfungible token, is a just your name on an online registry that says you maintain ownership of a digital item like artwork, a meme, a tweet or in this case a fvcking image of a fvcking bat. 

It makes no sense. Stop with this.

Written by Malcolm Henry

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