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Dear Media and Police Departments, No One Is Giving Away Their Edibles For Halloween

This should be a much shorter post, heck it could just be the headline and walk away, but it appears that it needs to be said once again — no one, and I mean NO ONE, is giving your kids their edibles for Halloween. No one is lacing their sweet tarts with acid. No one is wasting their time nor money to get your 10 year old high.

Yet, we have entered the predictable media cycle where very concerned news anchors remind people to ‘Check their treats’ as Halloween is just about a month away.

It started this year in Philadelphia, a place where sports fans throw batteries at Santa… trust me, they aren’t throwing edibles at strangers.

Here is the news angle from 6ABC.com, where police think they caught someone readying up to poison young minds:

Bensalem police reported that officers conducted a traffic stop earlier in September and confiscated what looked like normal candy. However, the items that looked like sour patch candies, Cheetos, and Sweetarts all contained THC.

Yes, the items looked like regular items because that is what the edibles looks like. It is what they are designed to look like. And, ***gasp** they also TASTE like those items, too.

They also cost $20 a pack.

Not a single person that I know is going to be giving out full-size candy bars this year… let alone their edibles.

If you want to get a good laugh you can check out that thread where people are asking what neighborhood would be handing this out as they will be making trips around the block to stock up.

Furthermore, not only is someone not going to willingly give up these tasty treats for Halloween, they are not going to confuse them for a real treat.

My edibles aren’t just mixing in with the junkfood drawer. I don’t want my roomates to take them — which again, no one is giving them away! — and I am not going to to accidentally pull out my mixbag of Hershey candy and then go into my bedroom, open my nightstand drawer, and put my edibles into the “Take ONE!” bowl that will be left out.

Just like my mom used to check candy for razor blades and needles because the media told her to, there will be people checking for edibles in the candy bags… they won’t be there.

“During this Halloween, we urge parents to be ever vigilant in checking their children’s candy before allowing them to consume those treats,” wrote another Pennsylvania police department. “Drug laced edibles are package like regular candy and may be hard to distinguish from the real candy.”

But in the spirt of covering all bases and to keep the kids safe, the Food and Drug Administration issued a list of Halloween food safety tips. You can click there to see what you can do to do your part… like not give away your edibles.

Photo by Mike Von on Unsplash

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Written by Malcolm Henry

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