Obviously, a lot of things change as you delve deeper into life in your twenties. Your body. Your priorities. Your level of apathy. It’s all part of becoming a semi-functional adult. However, the most significant change you will notice is your approach to the bedroom as your age and the stresses of life start weighing you down. It’s not a completely horrible thing, as there is much fun to be had, but there is definitely an evolution you experience that changes your attitude on this life-affirming activity.
22 to 24
Sex between 22 and 24 isn’t that much different than college sex. Sure, you may lose a step because you’re actually working, but there’s still a similar level of reckless experimentation, epic duration, and enthusiasm. You don’t know exactly what you want or the quickest ways to get the job done, but you have the energy for trial and error. That is, after that first fifteen-second 0-2 waste pitch. There is often a significant amount of alcohol involved as well. At least, until the morning session. Any guy in his late twenties knows that if he’s going to sleep with a girl in this age range, it’s going to be a marathon, and round two starts almost immediately after round one, and round three is almost inevitable. Keep your fluids up, keep a protein shake handy, and make sure to stretch. And don’t eat Chipotle the same day. Obviously.
25 to 27
This age range is kind of a middle ground between the 22-24 and the 28-30. You may need to pace yourself a little more as the pressure of postgrad life starts eating into your social life. My recommendation? An episode of Californication between each round and some pizza for carb loading. Stay in there and try to run out the clock, even if you have a few three-and-outs. You know a little more about what you like as well as your own technique, and you are more comfortable integrating those into your evening antics. And your success rate is far higher, which is obviously important for repeat business.
28 to 30
This is the final frontier of your postgrad sex life before it (probably) starts going downhill. Sure, you enjoy a little slap and tickle, but there’s more emphasis on post-coital activities such as your sex coma, pizza, and Sunday night football or Netflix. You’re more set in your ways, know exactly what you are doing, and basically have a formula to reach your goal. The goal is to mutually hit the finish line and ride out the aftershock by stuffing yourself, relaxing, and passing out. Round two is optional since you probably have to get up for work or errands in the morning, but a morning session isn’t necessarily out of the question. You know, grown up stuff. Unless you’re drunk. Then you regress to the 22-24 age range of no holds barred.