You’re Not Doing Yourself Any Favors By Wearing A Button Down And Jeans To The Bar

She tried not to show it, but the hesitation was there, and everyone in the room could tell she was having reservations as the words sputtered out of her mouth.

But I knew what she was thinking.

“Getting roasted by a girl in a kitchen full of this guy’s friends is going to be embarrassing for him. Maybe I should hold off.”

But I encouraged her, merely saying “No, no. Go on. I’d like to hear to what you think of this outfit.”

“You look…well, you just look different. It’s not an outfit you’re going to see anywhere tonight.”

I had a classic navy blue blazer on, paired with a scoop t-shirt and Levi 501 jeans in a shade of blue that could best be described as “90s cool.” My hair is a little shaggy at the moment and I am fully aware that I look like an asshole. Wearing socks with Birkenstocks isn’t normal and I know this. I’m aware of how ridiculous some of my outfits are. Nobody in their mid-20s is wearing a navy blue blazer out on a Friday night unless they’re going to a rehearsal dinner. And that’s precisely why I did it.

Like any other generation, we have a uniformed style of dress that doesn’t really differ all that much when you’re looking at a guy in his twenties with a college degree. Anything outside of the status quo at a bar or club gets you a side eye and an unoriginal comment from some bro with three of his friends who hates the outfit simply because it’s different.

People dislike things for a variety of reasons. But I’d wager that a large percentage of people who were used in some bullshit survey would say that for the most part, they hate things because they’re threatened by them. Change, or anything deviating away from the mean is terrifying.

Socks n’ Stocks?

Why do you think I do that? Yes, it’s extremely comfortable to walk on what can only be described as plush couches for the foot. But more to the point, it’s a conversation starter. I’m automatically more interesting than the other fifty assholes wearing the Sperry’s that don’t come with laces in them. When that girl hesitated ever so slightly before telling me how she really felt, I knew I had the right outfit on.

You walk into a bar on a Friday and Saturday night and you will essentially see the same outfit on every male there. It’s a button down shirt, untucked and adorned with a polo player and his horse on the left breast. It’s khaki pants or blue jeans, and it’s a haircut cropped on the sides and left a little bit longer on top to allow for the Overconfident Male to slick it to the side. Think of every character’s hair in Peaky Blinders. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that outfit (although that haircut is atrocious). I like the look of a button down from time to time, and I’d be lying to you if I said that there were some nights where I’ll wear something similar.

But you have to look at yourself as a product on the market. The issue with this outfit and others of the same ilk is this: you’re oversaturated. Consumers, and for the purposes of this article, women, see their ex-boyfriend in you.

They see the creep from that hotel bar last summer that got a little too handsy after buying her a drink. They see their dad or their little brother who just got to college. In short, your outfit that you think is working because of its uniformity is actually hurting you.

Look at yourself next weekend before you call your Uber to that pregame you don’t really want to go to and ask yourself one question; is someone going to make a comment regarding this outfit?

If the answer is yes, then you’re doing something right.

Switch it up with the wardrobe and you’ll see returns. I know you think you look like Zac Efron in Neighbors, but I can assure you, you don’t. Or don’t take this advice and continue to stand in a corner of the bar with your phone in hand pretending to text someone.