Thots From A Thot – How To Adult

Did you just graduate college? Did you just start a summer internship? Trying to get your life together because the person you’re dating has it together?

Here are my thots. 

1. Get a job (duh)

Doesn’t have to be your dream job. But get a job that pays for your lifestyle. If your job at Brooks Brothers doesn’t pay enough for your bar tab, try bartending. If you want to be an online twitch streamer, and you aren’t making any money, it doesn’t count as a job. You’re only a “TikToker” if it pays your rent. Still shoot for those dream jobs, but you have to make enough money to live.

2. Learn self-control and be honest with yourself financially

If you’re nervous about being able to pay your rent, you can’t go out and buy shots. You can’t go out for dinner. Grow up. You got to pregame at home. You don’t even have to go out, have a house party. You can’t be spending rent money on clothes, drinks, and weed. I know this sounds boring. I know it’s a buzz kill. But think of all the people you idolize. Maybe they spend a shit ton of money on partying, but they also make enough money. You can’t live like Jordan Belford if you aren’t working that hard or making that money. Use those things you want to spend money on as motivation. It doesn’t work as motivation if you reward yourself even when you don’t work.

3. Get Credit Cards

Only do this step if you’ve achieved self-control. Get as much cashback, no fee, credit cards as possible. If you can’t pay them off, SKIP THIS STEP!! You do not want to get into credit card debt. But if you can, put everything on these cards to get good credit.

4. Learn how to clean 

I know, I know… But once you find a rat or cockroach in your apartment, you will understand. Decorate your home. Clean your home. Buy a vacuum. It makes you more responsible.

5. Don’t get a pet if you can’t take care of it

Don’t expect your girlfriend or roommates to take care of your rescue pitbull. It may sound cool to have a dog around, but if you push that responsibility on others, people will start resenting you.

6. Invest if Possible 

With inflation, savings accounts are constantly losing value. Put that graduation money into bitcoin and make an earning. 

7. Date someone who isn’t overly needy

If you’re in your 20s and you are dating someone who is keeping you from staying late at work happy hours, GET OUT. You need to be meeting lots of people at this age. Most opportunities in life come from people you know. Think about it this way, part of your job is socializing at the bar. Not with your loser friends from college, but with people from work who are going places. With your friend’s friend who is starting a business. With the guy who has successful parents, the guy who plays who does physical therapy for an NBA team, the bartender who is starting a new restaurant, anyone who has a vision and goal for their life. If she’s the girl for you, she will understand. A relationship should be pushing you towards your goals.

8. Give yourself a Five Year Plan

Some sort of goal or vision for your life will keep your mind on the right track. Get a piece of paper and write seven things you want in five years.

Here are some examples…

  1. Where do you want to live
  2. What do you want to be making
  3. What job do you want 
  4. Places you want to travel 
  5. Assets you want to obtain
  6. What kind of friends do you want to have
  7. What kind of person do you want to be dating 
  8. Physical goals – like running a marathon or getting fit
  9. Parties you want to attend or be invited to 

What are things you want to achieve or experience? 

9. Learn how to put your phone down

I promise you, you will be happier.

Written by Caroline Bano

Super boring girl with mediocre personality....but I'm hot. Read my blog. NYC.

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