Watching amateur porn is like going thrift shopping. Nobody wants a shirt from another family’s chili cook off or the Eric Cartman pajama pants that belonged to a husky middle schooler that probably had ringworm. That being said, once in a blue moon, you’ll find a mint condition Randy Johnson jersey from when he was on the Diamondbacks, and you leave happy. OwlCrystal is that Randy Johnson jersey. She has Marilyn Monroe’s ravishingly beautiful aesthetic with Kardashian-Esque modern sluttyness intertwined. She looks like someone you’d find at a very niche convention where losers pay to watch hot girls cosplay as characters from Mad Men. Don’t believe me? Let’s check the tape.
Women like OwlCrystal remind me that the internet can be a beautiful place although it causes all of us constant anxiety. She’s a cross between a model, a photographer, and a Pornstar- but I guess you could say the same for half of the girls in LA. She’s from Estonia; which, is such an obscure country, I still know nothing about it AFTER five minutes of google research. Because she’s in the Quarantine “draft class,” I believe that she’s a sleeping giant. OwlCrystal currently ranks 332 on the PornHub amateur charts. Let’s boost her up, boys.
