Boulder’s Insane Weekend

I’m already in trouble with my bosses about not getting this out on Sunday, but this is where I was at 7 AM on Sunday. 

Between trying to pinpoint how I got to that position, and deep cleaning a coach, I spent most of yesterday having panic attacks and building up the courage to open my Bank of America app. Some advice for my younger readers: well-made Long Island Iced Teas hit astronomically different from the watered-down ones at Applebees you can seamlessly house fifteen of without an issue. 

But back to Boulder, here’s the best explanation I’ve found of the timeline of events.

What could probably best be described as a typical college Saturday a year ago escalated into the wook version of Project X

The most interesting part of the whole debacle has been the general public’s reaction and the Boulder student body NOT involved with said incident. We’re in a peculiar spot with this pandemic right now, and nobody wants to talk about it. With Spring Break on the horizon, and the vaccine being distributed at the same rate as puff-bars in a public high-school bathroom, I would go as far as to say that there’s the silent majority of people that no longer give a fuck. At the beginning of this pandemic, I had a liberal opinion on how the government should handle things. And with a year’s worth of data in, I’m man enough to admit that I was very wrong on parts of it (e.g. shutting down businesses, schools, ect). Every time I agree with Clay Travis, a little part of me dies, but I’ve seen too much heavy, non-COVID related shit. I’ve seen friends of friends commit suicide, multiple drug overdoses, and many of the people that I love struggle to get out of bed morning after morning. It’s easy to be the woke she/her on Twitter and call all those kids at Boulder selfish, but are they really the assholes?

Even my most liberal friends quietly gather in large groups and have started to wear their masks a little bit looser over their nose after topping off a third Rum & Coke. I’m not taking away the severity of 500,000 plus lives lost. I’m also not excusing those Boulder kids who damaged property that wasn’t theirs; that isn’t a Full Send that’s you being an attention seeking hardo. From what sources have told me, the kids that flipped that girl’s car are already in the process of being expelled from school. But if San Francisco’s less-gay brother city is throwing ragers, I think we’re back. I’m sick and motherfucking tired of pretending that the people still COVID shaming are in the majority at college campuses because they’re not. I’ll end my argument like this: the person shaming their fellow college students for wanting to go out, with a Twitter avatar that looks like this

is just about as big of an asshole in my opinion as the Texas Dad of four that refused to wear a mask at Cracker Barrel because it “infringed on his rights,” in May. 

PS, you guys don’t think blogging is hard? Try having the island of misfit toys in your mentions for a day. 

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