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BREAKING: Tory Lanez Prison Sentence Announced…

After a lengthy and controversial trial, rapper Tory Lanez has been sentenced to ten years in prison for shooting Megan the Stallion in the foot in 2020. While at one point we thought Tory would walk away from this incident scot-free, that reality is clearly no more.

In the case of this trial, I didn’t really care what actually happened. I was just rooting for Tory since I prefer listening to his music much more than Megan the Stallion. Everything has gone downhill since “WAP” – and I will stand by that take until I die. Nothing is quite like driving around aimlessly at night while blaring “The Color Violet”. While that song will last forever, it seems to me like Tory’s career is probably over. It goes without saying that ten years in jail is a long time. After Bobby Shmurda’s disappointing return from the penitentiary, I’m not gonna get my hopes up for Tory. 

This whole case is pretty ridiculous if you think about it. Tory Lanez is maybe 5’4” on a good day and Megan the Stallion is built like prime Ray Lewis, so the dynamic is just off from the beginning. Then, Tory somehow shoots Megan in the foot while she’s getting out of a car. You may be asking, “Why?”. I don’t think anyone has a clue. Free Tory till it’s backward. 

I feel like Megan the Stallion has fallen off pretty hard since her peak pandemic days. Once everyone had to actually start working again, she couldn’t rely on people doing ridiculous “dance” videos on TikTok to promote her music. If it seems like I’m hating on her – I fully am. No one should be able to lie and take away a national treasure like Tory Lanez from us. Honestly, going through this whole trial for simply getting shot in the foot is a little bit overkill in my opinion. Suck it up, Megan.

Written by the godfather

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