Cross Country is a Pedophile’s Dream

Yes, the title is true; we legally cannot lie to you. We are partnered with DraftKings to bring you this incredible new user offer that ends very soon!

Claim this offer using DraftKings:

  1. Sign up for DraftKings by clicking here
  2. Deposit $5 or more into your account
  3. Finally, place a $5 moneyline bet & get $150 in bonus bets ! (New users only)
Note* Want to bet on another game/sport? No problem – you’ll still get your $150 in bonus bets!*
cross

I hate how adults treat kids. I don’t think kids are given enough credit for how smart they are. I remember the whole bit where the adult would come up, shake my hand and pretend like I hurt them. I think that happened to each of us at least 10 times. The thing is, both the adult and I would laugh afterward, but we were both just laughing for the other person’s sake. The adult was laughing for me to show that it was all just a joke. And I was also laughing for the adult because I knew he thought what he did was funny so I’ll give you that

My point is, adults love to show how cool they are when kids are around and I hate it. My main experience comes from when I ran cross country in middle school and high school. I hated cross country because I hated running and that was it. I was required to play a sport every season when I was a kid, which was difficult for someone who didn’t like sports and was bad at 95% of them. So I did cross country and track because they seemed like the two sports that needed the least amount of skill to do, because, you’re just fucking running. Cross country is one of those sports that you can tell after just one practice whether you like it or not because… your just fucking running. 

But for the cross country meets, basically just where you and 2-5 other teams race, there was always a referee that would think he was the hottest shit ever. This guy wanted to look like a badass but always looked like he just killed 4 people. All he did was blow a whistle and look at our underage assholes in literally the tightest short shorts you could imagine. I swear these cross country “uniforms” were the most revealing piece of clothing ever. I honestly think that they are more revealing than clothes any woman has ever worn. It starts with a singlet which is basically just a tight sport sleeveless jersey. So it’s that and then the TIGHTEST SHORT SHORTS YOU HAVE EVER SEEN. 

I don’t know why we had to wear them, we were allowed to wear whatever we wanted during practice, but when it came to meets, they were very strict with having to wear the “uniform”. I would’ve used a photo of me for this blog, but it’s hard to find a photo of me from over 4 years ago where I was running in the woods for 18 minutes. It was weird because we were also only allowed to wear the uniform at meets and we would get yelled at by our coach if we had them on outside a meet. We would also get yelled at by the referee if we had anything on besides the uniform. So this 40-50-year-old man had to walk around every meet staring at underage students’ asses and tits to make sure they had on the tightest clothes in their wardrobe. That sounds bad but it’s true. This man had to inspect us in the most legal way possible to make sure we were wearing the most revealing clothes possible. He would also always do a huddle right before the race as a secondary way to get us all in close so he could confirm. “Alright, kids let’s have a fun and clean race. Also, Sarah, I’m kind of mad you made the switch to sports bras, I really enjoyed seeing those tits bouncing for 3 miles every Thursday.” 


Imagine if the referee during an NFL game huddled the two teams together just to talk. What the fuck is that shit? Like I’m going to watch 50 underage boys and girls run into the woods completely alone in clothes that are so tight that my dick doesn’t even know what to do anymore. Also, this guy knows the course we are running, like that’s his job. His job is to know all these courses which just adds to the creepiness. “No, it’s okay kids I know this course inside and out, you won’t get lost, let’s just get to the start line and get that ass moving.” I’m surprised he didn’t just run down the line of kids smacking each ass as he blows the whistle. “Okay kids once daddy smacks your ass then you can go and Sarah, seriously, let’s take off the sports bra it’s not gonna help.” I’m serious, cross country was a sport made for creeps just ask my coaches… But that’s a blog for another day.

21+. Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. T&Cs apply.

Back to Top