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Dear Women: Brazilians

Dear Women,

I think we all saw this one coming. I fell asleep watching The 40-Year-Old Virgin last night, so the idea of hair being covered in hot wax and then forcefully and painfully ripped off of the body was pretty fresh in my brain when I woke up this afternoon. Because of that, it was a pretty simple jump to today’s topic when I sat down to write this blog. What’s the deal with the Brazilian?

First of all, I’d like to say that I do actually know what it is. Not that it should be too much of an accomplishment, but I am putting out there that I believe I know more about this than I do most of the stuff I write to you guys about. The information I’m looking for this week starts simply with one question: why? I’m not saying I don’t appreciate it. God knows I appreciate it. I love that you’re willing to do it. But seriously, wouldn’t it be way easier and way less painful to just shave it? Is there some sort of special thing that goes on while you guys do that? I’m just trying to understand what would draw a woman to continuously subject herself to that. Again, I’m not complaining that it happens even a little bit, but I’m extremely interested in the decision-making process behind it.

And once you’re there, what is it like? I mean the thought of someone spreading wax on my junk and ripping it out is as close as I think of to living a nightmare in real life, so I do truly want to understand what the whole vibe is in there. Do they give you guys a lemonade or something to sip on while it all goes down? Are you making friendly conversation while some lady is yanking out your pubes straight from the fucking roots? Do you just do the female version of shirt-cocking it once you get in there, or is it easier to strip all your clothes off. I feel like personally, I’d rather be fully naked, but that’s just me. How badly does it hurt? Because based on how Steve Carrell reacted to his waxing, it certainly seems like it’s a kick in the dick level of pain.

I can tell you for a fact that I’ll never let anybody wax my scrotum, but if there is a way to reciprocate what you guys do (other than my pubes getting completely decimated by what I imagine to be the Happy Ending Massage’s evil twin) just let me know because I mean it when I say how awesome it is that you guys do that.

Love,

VinegarStrokes

Written by Vinegar Strokes

Above average intelligence, below average weiner.

3 Comments

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  1. A lot of women do Brazilian waxes because society teaches them to feel self-conscious about their body hair or feel like they have to do it to please their boyfriends. But women have just as much of a right to not shave or wax their body hair as men do, and society shouldn’t pressure them to have hairless bodies. Society certainly doesn’t pressure men to have the same. In fact, in many parts of the world, female pubic hair is actually considered attractive and a sign of femininity.

    • Waxing doesn’t really hurt too much if you go often. The hair roots get damaged over time, so the hair comes out so much easier. I feel a little bad saying this, but I enjoy the process for all the wrong reasons. I sort of like exposing myself to a total stranger and having their hands spreading out my lady bits. Worse, when I’m in that position while they go between the cheeks (yes, we have hair there), it’s kind of empowering. Like, I have a good living with the free money to do this, while this person’s livelihood is dependent on meticulously removing my pubic hair. Don’t get me wrong, I’m very respectful and nice to these people, but the thoughts cross my mind during the whole shebang.

  2. Relationship with my man have been on again and off. In recent days I have suspected his interest in other girls on 2 occasions. Once was with a girl he met at work, they went out to eat then to his house.although he lied about it for 8 months and hid it completely. The next time was with a married co-workers .Each time I raise the conversation he calls me insecure. the truth came out after I contacted a computer surgeon that hacked his phone and gained me remote access to his phone activities, I found out he always had his ways with those women on his off days, while I would be at work.I cried myself to sleep the night that I found out, but at this point, he is at the losing end..You can contact this Cyber hacker via {hackspeed24@gmail .com}, also reachable on WhatsApp +47 452 63 178, he really saved me from deceit. contact the genius for any hacking related assistance he will surely be of help.

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