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Don’t Put It In Your Name

In life, there are seers, and there are doers. Normally, you should try to fall on the side of the doers. Except for when it comes to putting your name on some things, such as but not limited to: getting an AirBnB, booking a party bus, ordering the fake id’s and renting out a hall. 

Now as a dooer, I know what you’re thinking: if I don’t book it no one else will, and buddy that is NOT the case. There is always one schmuck in the group that offers to put it in their name. 

But, it takes several phases to get there:

PHASE 1) You and your friends decide to do one of the four previously listed things. 

PHASE 2) Collectively you all look it up, do some research and figure out how much it’s going to cost. 

PHASE 3) Now it’s time to figure out who’s name it will go under. 

PHASE 4) Everyone in the group starts firing off bullshit answers as to why they can’t put it in their name, and the momentum is lost. 

PHASE 5) The glass half empty friend and glass half full friend go head to head. The glass half empty friend says something along the lines of “I guess we just won’t do it then” to which the glass half full friend replies “I’m sure we can figure it out.”

PHASE 6) Chicken. The group collectively plays chicken like this scene in Grownups, until one person offers to put it in their name.

For stepping up and saving the group, this person is now responsible for:

Shall I go on?

Listen, all I’m saying is…if you can avoid having all of this weighing over your head when you’re supposed to be having fun, why wouldn’t you. When in doubt, toss it on Chad’s Daddy. 

Written by Grace O'Malley

If Carrie Bradshaw drank a little bit too much and was originally from Boston...

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