Weddings are a really magical and special time – I just went to one on Sunday – and in order to keep things running smoothly, there’s a few things you should keep in mind if you’re attending as a guest.
Do: Let the Bride and Groom Know What You Thought of the Food
Those two lovebirds just spent a ton of money on this whole shebang, and a lot of that money went to the food. That means you shouldn’t hesitate to let them know if your steak was undercooked, the salad was soggy, or if the menu just wasn’t to your liking. It’ll give them good constructive criticism for next time.
Don’t: Hold Back on an Open Bar
Like I said before, weddings are really expensive, so if you’re getting treated to an open bar, it would be rude if you didn’t make sure they got their money’s worth. Treat each drink you get like a glass of water and make believe you just finished a marathon. In all honesty, they’d prefer you get so drunk you don’t remember the reception at all.
Do: Make a Speech
So what if you’re there as a plus one and don’t know the bride or groom personally? It’s their day, which means they’ll want you to shower them with as much praise as possible, and is there any better way to do that than with a speech you make up on the spot after a few alcoholic beverages?
Don’t: Dress Up at All
The married couple will probably be expecting you to be the center of attention when dancing starts, so it would be pretty stupid to wear something like a suit that would restrict your movement out on the dancefloor. You’ll probably get pretty sweaty, so grab some dirty gym clothes to make your laundry load a little smaller.
Do: Crack Jokes During the Ceremony
Anyone who’s ever been to church or synagogue or wherever you worship (because it doesn’t matter the religion) knows this: that stuff is boring. Most weddings include some kind of religious part during the ceremony, so you should take it upon yourself to make people laugh while that’s going on. A well-timed “That’s what she said!” or ripping a fart real loud is always a surefire way to get a chuckle.
Don’t: Get a Gift
Wedding gifts are crazy expensive, but you know what isn’t? A label and a pen. Just head to Staples and grab a cheap “To: / From:” sticker to slap on the biggest gift at the table. You don’t have to lose any money, and they’ll think you got them a crockpot for the rest of their lives. Everybody wins.
