Five Useless College Majors

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High School Diploma

One of the coolest things about college is that you can decide to study anything you want. It’s also one of the most hilarious things because it allows complete morons to pick majors that will serve absolutely no purpose in the real world. 

Art History

At least if you major in art, you can become an artist or an art teacher. Deciding to be an art history major is a hilarious choice because not only does it scream at the world that you never want to make any money, but it also says that even though art is one of the things in this world you love most, you have zero talent for it yourself. 

Gender Studies

One of the things of which I’m most proud is that I never took a single gender studies course in college, despite the fact that simple logic tells me that it would’ve been the easiest A of all time. So congratulations to anyone who’s majoring in Gender Studies. You had a cakewalk of four years, wasted six figures, and now have to teach gender studies because there’s absolutely no real world application for what you just got a degree in.

Entrepreneurship

I’m sure an Entrepreneurship minor or certificate could be helpful if you’re studying something else in the business world, but in what universe is majoring in it a good idea? From my understanding, being an entrepreneur means that you’ve created a business or product that became successful, not that you spent your time in college taking classes like “How to Come Up With a Good Idea” and “Best Ways to Persuade Investors.”

Criminal Justice

Your post grad options are either going to law school or joining some kind of law enforcement. Here’s an interesting factoid: you don’t need to be a Criminal Justice major to do either – you don’t even need to go to college to go into law enforcement. All you’ve done by selecting criminal justice is take away any option to do anything else when you inevitably decide that the LSAT is way too freaking hard.

Library Science

This wouldn’t be a bad choice if not for the fact that the only people going to libraries are homeless people looking for warmth and serial masturbators who don’t have home wifi. Have fun shushing people for the rest of your life.

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