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Hollywood Brown, The New Fastest Man Alive, Arrested

BALTIMORE, MARYLAND - NOVEMBER 07: Marquise Brown #5 of the Baltimore Ravens high fives with fans after their overtime win against the Minnesota Vikings at M&T Bank Stadium on November 07, 2021 in Baltimore, Maryland. (Photo by Todd Olszewski/Getty Images)

When I think of the fastest NFL wideouts, usually players like Tyreek Hill or Ja’Marr Chase come to mind. But as of today, Marquise Brown is the clear-cut number one. Arrested this morning for criminal speeding, the new Arizona Cardinal could face up to thirty days in jail, as well as probation and minor fines. Specific details have yet to be released, but according to Arizona law, criminal speeding could mean a couple of different things:

Now, if I had to guess, Marquise Brown probably drives a really nice car. And, just speculating here, that car probably goes really fast. So, odds are “Hollywood” was exceeding 85 MPH on the way to practice or whatever NFL players do at 7:05 in the morning (the time of his arrest). While in the grand scheme of things this isn’t a Miles Bridges-level crime, and Brown will continue on with his NFL career, I hope this arrest will serve as a warning to NFL players and fans to do a good deed and not speed (at least until you’re sure the cops are gone). Fantasy implications? Most likely none. The only thing that really changes is the team name upside if you end up drafting him. 

But, let’s look on the bright side, maybe this enthrallment with speeding will allow “Hollywood” to bond with some of his new teammates:

What do you think?

Written by the godfather

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