Mailman Dave
I was trying to watch Wedding Crashers for my next Cinema Cures blog, and I was watching via Fubo, which has commercials. I didn’t think twice about it, I’ve seen the movie a dozen times, and during the ads, I’ll scroll on Tik Tok. Well, Truth had an anti-vaping ad for every commercial break, and I couldn’t take it. For people my age, we had D.A.R.E, which just made young idiots more curious about drugs and had us all try out these drugs. It looks like today’s equivalent is Truth which is going against Juuling hard. I figured it was my duty to make fun of these shitty ads that aren’t going to do anything because nicotine is a sweet, loving substance.
I had to screen record, which doesn’t give you the audio, but trust me, you’re not missing much. I’ll sum it up for you. I would vape because I have depression and anxiety. I used vaping as a coping method. I realized after I quit that I needed to address the issues and not try to self-medicate. Have you ever heard of Marijuana? If you’re going to self-medicate with anything, I will give the electric lettuce a try. Nobody really likes themselves, so what better way than pumping yourself with nicotine. I know I’m a fan of it as I currently have a horseshoe in my mouth. Truth nobody wants to address the shit that’s wrong with them. Vaping is much easier, and I’m always cool with what’s easier.
Once again, screen recording, so no audio. The first ad is about a girl trying to talk while running. Motherfucker I know you’ve never vaped or smoked darts if you can talk while running. Don’t try to fake that you’re this amazing quitter. Nobody likes a quitter. She then makes a stupid ass joke about when she runs 3 miles; all she realizes is that she hates running. The only reason you should be running is if it’s from the cops. Fuck taking care of yourself. Keep inhaling those delicious chemicals.
In the second ad, the guy is just saying that he has also seen signs to quit vaping, while he drops posters that literally say quit vaping. Get it? It’s so funny, and in the end, he’s wearing the same saying on his shirt fucking comedic genius on display. If you lose your Juul and don’t have a backup or instantly go to the store to get another one, you’re a fucking rookie. Two days after I dislocated my knee cap there, I was hobbling to the store to buy more chew; momma didn’t raise no bitch.
If you want to quit nicotine, it’s probably good for your health, but don’t shove it down everybody else’s face. Nobody likes the vegan guy who posts about saving animals, living such a better life after not eating meat. Or the person who loves Cross Fit and needs to shove it down your throat that they are going to multiple Cross Fit workouts a day.
