Job interviews can be scary. You don’t know what they are going to ask you or the type of answers they’re looking for. No matter how much you prepare, they can and will always throw a wrench in your planning. The only way to have complete certainty an interview will go well is if you dominate it. Here are three ways to dominate your next job interview.
Arrive fashionably late
One thing I’ve learned in my dozens of failed job interviews is that interviewers can smell desperateness from miles away. Though something may be your dream job, you don’t want to act like you will die if you don’t get it. Basically, they want to see that you are secure enough in both yourself and your abilities. You know how to prove to someone that you believe in yourself and know your own worth? Show up late. Not a full 30 minutes or anything crazy, but showing up 5-10 minutes late shows that you have bigger fish to fry than just some silly little interview. Plus, if you show up late, the interviewer will be even more excited to see you than ever. They will immediately be happy to see your face as they are no longer just sitting in an empty Zoom all alone. Trust me, if you want to seem cool (which is what job interviews are all about) you gots to show up late. It will earn you respect and the job.
Ask your interviewer to stand up
Thanks to that pandemic we had a while back, society has gotten lazy. I for one love it. As someone who currently works remotely, I’ll tell you all right now that I rarely wear pants to work. The same goes for job interviews. Now that all HR employees work from home, interviews are done over Zoom, meaning there is no need to wear pants. That’s where this awesome power trick comes in. Towards the beginning of the interview, kindly ask your interviewer to stand up. Make the point that you must ensure this is an appropriate company that doesn’t cut corners. One of two things will happen, either they are wearing pants and will show you, or they aren’t wearing pants and will refuse to show you. If the former is true, give them a small golf clap and simply say “splendid.” In the case they aren’t wearing pants, this is now your chance to bond. Obviously, you yourself aren’t wearing trousers as they restrict your mobility and thus your overall optimal potential. This now becomes your in. You have the opportunity to make a fun joke about how you also aren’t wearing pants. The interviewer will find this absolutely hysterical and you will then become best friends. Boom, job solidified.
Tell them you are on Undercover Boss
If you can sense the interview is not going the direction you had hoped, this is a last resort technique that is sure to flip the script. All you need to do is claim to be the true CEO of the company and that you are actually doing the interview as part of Undercover Boss. They will be shocked, confused, and probably a bit skeptical, but if you are confident it may work. Just tell them that you are trying to scope out the entire interview process and that you must be put through to the next round. If you are nervous about how this will go, maybe consider wearing a wig or glasses to rip off when you reveal yourself as the company’s owner. This adds legitimacy and theatrics. Everyone loves theatrics. Fair warning, this only works up until you make it to the final round. Once that happens, you’re gonna need to enact tips #1 and #2 to seal the deal. Or tell them about the whole scheme, maybe they’ll respect your creativity and boldness. Worst case, you are exactly where you started.
Disclaimer: The person who wrote this blog obtained their job here at TFM through Instagram DMs. In reality, they are very poor at interviews.
