I Want Watermelon: The Greatest Game Ever

This game is taking over my life and I’ve only had the app for 24 hours.

My girlfriend put me on to this new game called I Want Watermelon and as much as I hate both fruit and listening to her, damn she was right. This is the greatest game of all time.

Though it’s not a hard game to play, it is extremely difficult to explain. That said, here goes nothing.

Okay, so it’s kind of a mixture of 2048, Candy Crush, Tetris, and Fruit Ninja. All great games, yes, yet none compare to Watermelon (that’s what I call it for short).

Watermelon takes the fruity graphics of Fruit Ninja, the strategy of 2048, and a combination of skill from both Tetris and Candy Crush. Basically, the point of the game is to get as many watermelons as possible. Just like 2048, you combine smaller fruits to make bigger ones. Just like how two 4s in 2048 would combine to make an 8 and then 8s combine to make a 16, in Watermelon, two grapes make a strawberry which when combined with another strawberry makes a lime. This goes on for a while until you finally get two coconuts to make a watermelon. Confused yet?

So how does one combine said fruits? Well, here’s where Tetris and Candy Crush come in. There is a red line at the top of the screen. You must remain below the red line to continue playing. As you play, a new fruit drops from the top of the screen. It is your job to decide where it falls so that it can combine with another fruit of its kind, while also remaining underneath the dreaded red line. Now, you gotta be confused.

I promise you all, this game is way simpler than my explanation. While I wouldn’t say it’s necessarily for children, they could definitely figure it out (although they probably wouldn’t be very good).

Fair warning, the game is long, frustrating, and super addicting. If you are half-decent, a typical game will take you about 10 minutes. However, you will undoubtedly be annoyed with how you lost and inevitably start again. Expect to spend about an hour on the app every time you play. 

In terms of addiction, Watermelon is right up there with TikTok. My screen time is so bad right now I look like one of those discord mods who thinks cats are sexy. Over the last 24 hours, I have legitimately spent over four hours playing this game. If you subtract the 10 hours I was asleep (it’s called beauty rest, you don’t just wake up this handsome without putting in the work), that’s about 29% of my overall time dedicated to smashing lemons together. Do I regret a second of it? Nope.

Despite its addictiveness, I truly do feel healthier playing Watermelon than I do scrolling through TikTok. Though it can’t be good for me, I still feel like I’m at least using my brain rather than it simply turning to mush. Getting off TikTok feels like you just took a fat womp, except its way worse because you don’t get that nitrous oxide high we all crave.

So let’s start a mental diet together and replace TikTok with Watermelon (not the fruit, I’m not into physical diets). Trust me, you’ll feel better about yourself, have some fun, and stop giving China all of your information. It’s a triple win.

To download the I Want Watermelon app, click here.