If The Delivery Truck Is Rockin, Don’t Come Knockin

High five, golf clap, and hat tip to this man. If I have expertise on anything, it’s delivering packages, and it’s not the package that this man delivered. This man is living the dream of all delivery workers. There has been the long stereotype of mailmen fucking while housewives are home, but that doesn’t happen. Delivery people can go wherever they want and may see some things. I have many loops where I cut through people’s backyards, and I’m not on the typical pathway. The stereotype in all porn videos is the delivery man is walking, looks through a window, and sees a naked woman. The woman then invites the delivery man in, and they fuck. Instead, all I’ve seen in my 7 years of delivering mail is old men wearing a robe that isn’t tied and people getting hammered at 9:30 in the morning.

For the post office, our scanner tracks us, and after 9 minutes, the scanner tells our boss that we’ve been sitting in one spot. I wonder if this is the same for Amazon? If so, that’s plenty of time to get laid and still have 7 minutes until the scanner goes off.

What package did they choose to fuck on? Did they have to Jenga stack a bunch of packages together? There’s no way there’s enough room back there to fuck properly. There’s no way it was a proper fuck. That man has no time for foreplay; he’s got a job to do. You think pooping on the clock is the best way to have free time while at work? Well, this man was fucking on company time.

Not only is this man a living legend for all delivery men, but he’s also a gentleman look at how he holds open those van doors as she climbs out. He didn’t have to do that; that’s a man you want to bring home to meet your parents.

Written by Mailman Dave

Just a regular mailman who wants to sit around and write about sports​

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