Since time immemorial sharks have filled the seas of this great planet and fraternities have been a part of this country’s higher education.
Though the respective presences of sharks and frats have remained constant, how they look and act change with the times. Context is everything and how certain things abide within the context of frats past might no longer vibe with the brotherhoods of today. It is with this in mind that we must regularly stop and ask ourselves… Say it with me now!
IS! IT! FRAT!?
Marriage, the supposedly eternal bond between two people symbolizing their commitment to love and work with each other. There is a lot of unspoken baggage that has been slowly added on to this most ancient of institutions over the years. These days it seems at the same time both hyped up in its inception, with proposals and marriage ceremonies being these huge spectacles, and yet also the simplest thing to break and walk away from. So it is noting this strangest and yet quickest of dismissed oddities that we look deeper.
Ancient ceremonies and pledges of commitment, sound familiar to anyone else who has gone through initiation? Having SEX?! Potentially a lot!? Continuing your bloodline in a non-trashy way? Being traditional? Sounds pretty frat to me. And you gotta grow up sometime right? You can’t just rage fucking face your whole life or you look less like a Faf gentleman and more like a creepy fuck What are the chances YOU can pull off being a suave James Bond pulling fine young thangs and not some fat single loser TRYING to pull young thangs and actually just scaring them?
“She took the kids, the dog, and half my money which if I’m honest wasn’t as much money as I thought it’d be at this point in my life. I thought I could convince her to do buttstuff. She seemed kinda into it and just on the cusp of greatness. I was sure! I don’t know what happened.”
But people just stop trying. They think “Now I’ve got ‘em” and move on to other things or just want to stop putting in the effort because it is just that: effort. If someone is on your team it doesn’t make sense that you have to PUT effort into it… right? Wrong. Weird but true. And of all the everlasting individual bonds we keep making, it’s with the sex we don’t understand, even though it’s societally understandable to keep railing them without marriage and it apparently keeps them interested to NOT be married. How come we don’t have like everlasting Homie bonds?
So now we come to the moment of truth, and say it with me!
HOW! FRAT! IS IT?!
The Fratometer says……
Interesting! I’ve never seen this before! The Fratometer seems to be oscillating between Faf and NF!
Perhaps coming on the heels (ok, gotta watch the phrasing… #Footstuff) of Valentines Day the Fratometer is still a little in its feelings! It looks like it’s saying marriage is what you make of it but that whatever you DO make of it will be one way or the other, no middle ground, EVEN IF it doesn’t end in a split.
Wow, that was an interesting turn of events, isn’t it folks?!
Well, catch us next time for…
IS! IT! FRAT!?