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Jay Cutler: Bear Slayer For Life

Photo by Jay Cutler via Outsider

It appears that Jay Cutler has gone from shooting the Bears in the foot to shooting them in the head.

The retired Chicago quarterback has spent the past few days in Montana as part of the state’s annual spring bear hunt, and the one-time Pro Bowler was lucky enough to walk away with a big prize. On Tuesday morning, Cutler reportedly shot and killed a cinnamon black bear with a scope bolt action rifle. He later posted on Instagram with his trophy, writing in the caption “heading home to get some summer ale.” The caption tags Gratis Beer, a brewing company founded by Cutler, which markets itself as a beer made for “pool parties and beaches.”

It’s official, Jay Cutler is a man’s man. We already knew he could sling the pigskin (though not always very accurately), but now he has his own beer company that knows exactly what I like, and kills animals that could eat me in one fell swoop. I mean this guy is the definition of a pussy slayer.

As for the comments on Cutler’s post, well let’s just say his following is going to be changing. A lot of the comments were unhappy he was “murdering animals,” many writing “this is why your wife left you,” referring to Cutler’s split from ex-wife Kristin Cavallari. Of course, these were all white women who probably followed him due to his ex and most likely didn’t even know he played football. As for the men in his comments, those tended to either write things about Cutler always killing bears or fending off the liberal vegetarians.

Well, as someone who has never once eaten a bear or ever wants to come face-to-face with one, I will congratulate Jay on his achievement. I hope to see him put his kill to good use and make one of those blankets that still has the head attached or maybe make a pimp coat out of it. For those of you who side with PETA and the Karens in the comments, just know that the Montana Fish and Wildlife Commission does deem bear hunting “a crucial part of state conservation.” Take that you beyond-meat-bitches. 

Alex Becker

Written by Alex Becker

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