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Most Expensive Experiences of College

Orientation Week

Getting back to campus early as an upperclassman, while freshmen are stuck doing “ice breaker” activities and telling one another their pronouns can be an extremely expensive week to two-week period. You’ll end up buying alcohol just about every single day, and then spending more money at the bars at night. Add drunk food, groceries, and enough cases of water (for the hangovers, of course!) to give drink to a small African tribe, and you’ve pretty much burned through your entire summer savings before the school year has even begun. Dangerous.

Spring Break

Let’s break it down:

Uber to airport, plane ticket there, Uber to hotel/AirBnB, alcohol for seven days, food for seven days, drunk food for seven days and nights, bars, a nice dinner at some point (even though there’s a perfectly good Wawa a half-mile away, inevitable damage costs on hotel/AirBnB, possible bail postings, fines, Uber back to airport, plane ticket home, Uber back to campus. That is a shit load of money, and if you think you know how much you’re going to spend before going, you don’t. Spring Break will drop a roofie in your bank account’s margarita and send it to the ER with rectal tears. It’s a killer.

21st Weekends

If you’re lucky, on your own 21st you won’t pay for too many drinks. But when it’s a friend’s 21st? Oh, boy, are you fucked. If you’re visiting someone, there’s the gas you’ll spend to get there and back. You’ll end up having to buy drinks for whomever has just turned legal as well as for yourself – and you’re not going to be going to the cheap bars that all the underagers go to. You’ll be hitting up places that charge $20 for a double that’s more watered down than the bottle of Vodka in the back of your parents’ liquor cabinet. Then there’s the inevitable trips to casinos, in which you will never come out positive. They’re a blast, but they absolutely tank your financials.

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Written by VinegarStrokes

Above average intelligence, below average weiner.

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