Pornstar Jimmy is Back

So, all you Trey Lance owners who wouldn’t shut up about how good he was going to be this season look real foolish now, don’t you? I think my favorite take was the idea that a player who had barely played in college was going to somehow win MVP of the league his first year under center. Don’t get me wrong the 49ers have a really solid roster, but the only people y’all were fooling were yourselves. This was a project year with him under center at best case scenario. At worst it was, well, what we got I guess. However, now that Pornstar Jimmy is back this team is only gonna get better.

The first reason why this team will be better now is that Jimmy G had this team in the Super Bowl. I’m sorry, maybe you guys misread that last sentence. Let me repeat myself. Pornstar Jimmy was in a Super Bowl with this exact team. Why in a million god damn years would Trey Lance make this team better? But besides that very big and very obvious point let’s also look at Jimmy G’s record with this team. Oh, it’s 31-14. So that’s pretty good. To put that in context it’s a better win percentage than Aaron freaking Rodgers. Mr. Double MVP himself.

I mean maybe I’m the crazy one because everyone tells me I’m dead wrong with this take, but math is math. The 49ers win with Jimmy G. Why not play him?

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Written by Warren Loukota

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