Some Loser Stopped a Beyonce Nip Slip

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During a recent performance, Beyonce was dancing on stage when her top slowly became undone. In a twist of news more devastating than any submarine has been recently, one of her backup dancers rushed over to her to cover her up. Fans of Queen Bey applauded her ability to continue performing in the midst of this confusion. I can agree with that. My issue with this, comes from the praise that this moron is receiving. NEVER praise the guy who covered up Beyonce’s nipples. That guy is the worst

The video is linked here, I just wish it was more exciting. Clearly, her top is holding on for dear life, and it is about to give up. Everyone in the audience saw it. Her backup dancer obviously saw it. I can’t blame this guy for staring at Beyonce’s cleavage instead of doing his job. I was doing it about ten minutes ago. But what this man did was take away a moment of fun from the entire planet. 

I’m not even going to pretend to like this guy for playing the role of hero. People are talking about how he saved Beyonce from an uncomfortable moment or some shit like that. Don’t give me that. Nip-slips are a better marketing tool than anything I’ve learned about in four years of advertising classes. Beyonce probably invited the nip-slip for the number of streams she was about to receive as she began to trend on Twitter. Unfortunately for Beyonce, her backup dancer is too selfish for her to keep the spotlight, and this guy pulled a reverse Timberlake. 

This is an official message for everyone else to not interrupt a classic internet moment as it’s happening. No one separated Chris Rock and Will Smith at the Oscar’s last year. As a result we got twelve hours of fun before those memes got old. Everyone else take notes. Let slaps and nipples populate the internet. 

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