Mailman Dave
If you’ve read my other blogs, you know that I’m crippled and can barely walk right now after dislocating my kneecap. Even though I’m doing hours of PT, my knee isn’t close to being 100%. The summer is coming up, which means drinking games while outside, and I can’t be anything close to an athlete right now, so some games are gone for me. It’s not exactly easy to play beer die when you can barely walk; standing while playing beer pong is gone as the balls bounce off into nothingness is hard to bend over to get it as it rolls under the couch. Playing an intense game like stack cup is gone, you lose the ball and have to chase it, you’re fucked. You’ll have every cup stacked on top of you as you hobble back to the table and realize that you have dozens of beers to drink. So for me to participate in drinking games, we need to find some that my fat ass can sit down for. Here’s a list of drinking games that I found that you can play while sitting.
Quarters
We are going with an OG drinking game here. Something that has been played for years, across many generations. Growing up I never actually played quarters with my friends, it was the only drinking game I would play with my dad. Of course, I wasn’t drinking when I was 12 and trying to bounce a quarter into a shot glass, but I still had loads of fun. If you have no idea what I’m talking about here is a video explaining how to play quarters.
Kings Cup or Ring Of Fire or Circle Of Death
I’ve always called this game Kings Cup, but all you need is a deck of cards and an unopened beer can. Everybody has different rules for this game which makes the game fun. If you’re playing with people who you normally don’t see at parties, they can bring new rules to the game. In my opinion, the best rule is waterfall. Whoever pulled an ace starts drinking, whoever is next to them must start, and they can’t stop until the person in front of them stops. This goes around in a circle, and it allows you to really fuck somebody over. You can keep chugging, knowing that the person behind you can’t keep up. The only downside to Kings is that the drunker that everybody gets, the harder it is to follow the rules. Somebody will pull a 4, and they’ll point up to the sky when they should be pointing to the floor. This will go on and on until you start to get pissed at the person that keeps fucking up the most.
Ride The Bus
Sticking with cards games, the next one to play with your injured buddies is Ride The Bus. This game is best played if you have a friend who doesn’t really like to drink, or they don’t want to get hammered; they just casually drink; they can automatically be the dealer. There are many rules to this game, so the drunker you get, the more likely you’re going to start fucking up the game. Speaking about getting hammered, playing Ride The Bus will get you fucked up very quickly. It’s a game of mostly luck, and for the most part, you are just guessing which card will come next. For round 1, you’re guessing red or black; for round 2, you’re guessing higher or lower than the card you already have; for round 3, you’re guessing whether the next card will be either in-between or outside the number of cards you already have, and round 4 is guessing the suit. After this, you have to build the pyramid, and instead of telling you, this video is much better at explaining the game.
Horse Race
You want to add the thrill of horse gambling to getting drunk well horse race is the game for you. It’s a very simple game where you are cheering on your horse(suit you betted on) to reach the end of the table first. Suddenly you’re screaming at the dealer, you’re swearing at spades, and if you’re playing with a big group you have multiple people living and dying by the suit of a card. It’s a great game to play with 4 friends or with a huge group, and there will always be the one asshole who will bet a shotgun. Suddenly you’re not even cheering for your own horse, but hoping that everybody doesn’t have to shotgun a beer.
Golf
This isn’t going outside and trying to chip your golf ball in a hole, or some sort of putting game. Remember your boy is crippled I can barely walk this is a card game. Unlike Ride The Bus, or Horse Racing you don’t need a somewhat sober dealer. Everybody can be fucked up because this game is super easy. In the video that I’ll link they played the game a little differently. I played that pairs become 0, and you have a sheet that you keep track of everybody’s scores. When 9 holes of golf were played the losers all had to drink their entire beer. It’s a simple game where you’re trying to get the lowest score possible, and being able to stop a round gives you a lot of power. You can be the asshole who knocks and stops in the first round, or you can never knock since you’re hoping for one specific card.
7, 11 or Doubles
We are moving away from card games and going to a dice game. For some reason, there is not one good YouTube video that explains the rules. So here’s how you play. One player starts to roll the dice; if they don’t get 7, 11, or doubles, the next person rolls. If somebody gets 7, 11, or doubles, the roller picks one person to drink. The drinker has to pick up his drink and start to drink as the roller keeps rolling. If the drinker finishes before the roller doesn’t get a 7, 11, or double, they are safe, and the dice keep moving. If the roller gets a 7, 11, or double before the drinker finishes, they have to drink again, and on it goes. There are some hardo moves like the drinker must touch their cup before the roller goes, and if you roll the dice before the drinker touches their cup, the roller then needs to drink instead. That part isn’t that important if you’re just casually playing. It’s a lot of fun where everybody cheers on the roller as everybody wants the drinker to lose. If you play with heavy cups, people will get very drunk very fast.
Just because one of your friends is hurt doesn’t mean that there aren’t many drinking games that you can play. I also don’t blame you if you don’t want to break a sweat while getting hammered; sometimes, it’s fun to chill around a bar and not have to dive on the floor for dice or a ping pong ball. I know that I’m missing some games, but these are my favorite drinking games to play while sitting.
