Thoughts From a Communal Shower: What Are Finance Bros?

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stressful day

As I stood in a pool of hair this morning in the shower, a thought came to me: What even is a finance bro? If you break down the term into its most basic form, a finance bro should simply be a male involved in the field of finance, which is pretty broad if you ask me. But for some reason, our society has deemed finance bros as much more than that.

If I worked as a construction worker – but only wore Patagonia vests – am I a finance bro? If I was an investment banker at Goldman Sachs – but actually treated women with respect – am I still a finance bro? The lines are too blurred for my liking. Generally speaking, the rise of finance bro TikTok skits has led to a negative association with the term. However, I personally think everyone just needs to take a couple of hours out of their day and watch Leonardo Decaprio’s greatest movie: The Wolf of Wall Street. 

The Wolf of Wall Street not only features Margot Robbie in her prime but truly exemplifies the life of glory that comes with being a “finance bro”. I’ve yet to meet someone who can look me dead in the eyes and say “I don’t want to get filthy rich and throw little people like darts”. That’s just the lifestyle that finance bros are after, and if they have to work one-hundred-twenty hours a week to do so, they will. I don’t see anything particularly wrong with that – but then again I’m not planning on raising a family with a finance bro anytime soon. 

So, as I concluded my shower this morning, I realized that we all need to just cut these guys some slack because at their core they are men of principle and drive. Are a lot of finance bros inevitably going to be douchebags? Yes. But let’s at least wait to call them out on it until their daddy reinstates their weekly allowance.

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