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Trolling An Idiot From BuzzFeed

I started blogging in October of last year. In the beginning, it was just a recreational hobby that I did to give the people that follow me on social media a laugh on a shitty day, but after a bit of success, I realized that it could be a career path. I have reached out to hundreds of journalists, content creators, and potential podcast guests(That Never Happened available on all streaming platforms) with a probably five percent response rate. Now, getting people to read my blogs is easy. TFMs platform compared to the free website I was blogging on is what Lexington Steele’s horse-sized cock is to the continental breakfast sized sausage girls sometimes let me enter them with. I’m forever grateful that I work for a company that believes in me and values my opinion on shit, and oh, by the way, Daddy’s getting PAID. But like I mentioned, the beginning was a dog fight.

 This is where Brianna Sacks comes in. You probably don’t know who Brianna Sacks is because she’s an ostentatious BuzzFeed journalist who flaunts her blue Twitter checkmark like my cat flaunts its asshole. She’s the type of person that gets offended while playing Cards Against Humanity then makes a fucking scene. She’s probably somewhere in a Brooklyn studio apartment right now scouring the internet for cheap plane tickets to South America so she can ~ go soul searching ~. But with all things considered, she’s somewhat “made it” in an industry I was clawing my way into, so I shot her a DM. 

Was this approach aggressive? Most definitely. But I have had more than enough of these inquiries end up with success, because who the fuck wouldn’t pitty a 19 year old kid? I would have had absolutely no problem with a “no”(I get told no all the time), but because she decided to be a raging bitch about it… well, I had to troll her. 

So what does a kid with too much time on his hands do? He preys upon his victim’s distaste for greek life and her borderline obnoxious tendencies towards straight white males by orchestrating a gofundme for a dismantled fraternity chapter at the University of Alabama.

CNN contributors, ill-mannered, overenthusiastic voices in the feminist community, and above all, the integrity of Buzzfeed as a whole couldn’t take five fucking seconds to do their job. Julia Wick is legitimately one of the most important voices at the LA Times. One fucking google search, and you see that Delta Sigma Phi was kicked off campus and a national news story. This is the danger of journalism. Whether Brianna was too busy to google anything about this story, or she knew this was a troll and just wanted to rile up her followers anyway, it’s lazy journalism.

Too thirsty my dude,

Birdlaw

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Written by Bobby D'Angelo

TFM middle school penis game champion. Rutgers student.

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