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Two New Products Hit The Market For When You Are Stoned

Being high and getting hungry is not just a movie chiche, it is a scientific fact.
Being high and wanting breakfast food is also not just a movie chiche… well, maybe it is but for me it is also a fact. Fvck you, science.

And now we have two new products that are going to be a regular part of my rotation: Eggo-flavored Pop Tarts… and Wendy’s Frosty cereal.

Read that again: Eggo-flavored Pop Tarts… and Wendy’s Frosty cereal.
MOTHER OF GOD, YES.

Here are the details…

A press release distributed from Kellogg’s promises a “flaky, buttery-yellow crust, reminiscent of an Eggo waffle” while the Pop-Tart will contain a “sweet, maple-flavored filling.” It will then be topped with white icing and “a waffle-like grid pattern made from yellow-string icing.”

The release reads like this offering will be a permanent item on the grocery shelves as it has ‘no limited-edition’ details included. Packages of the breakfast treats will be available starting in December at the regular Pop Tart price of $2.99 for an 8-count box.

As for the Frosty cereal, it goes like this…

Kellogg’s and Wendy’s announced the dessert-turned-breakfast on Tuesday — but like the Eggo Tarts, we all will have to wait until December to take a spoonful of the chocolatey concoction. 

Unlike the Eggo adventure, it sounds like this cocoa-coated cereal, which combines with chocolate-flavored marshmallow pieces, will only be available for a limited time. Damn.

It sounds like we are about to get two size options though, an 8.3 oz for a retail price of $3.99 and a 13.2 oz variety for $5.69. While that sounds a little high there are plans to make the limited-run more palatable: each box includes a free small Frosty or Frosty-ccino with any Wendy’s app purchase. 

As for the science: THC interacts with receptors in our brain that regulate emotions, pain and our sense of smell and taste. It can also promote the release of the hormone ghrelin, which stimulates hunger.

Eggo-Tarts, Frosty-O’s will satisfy.

Written by Malcolm Henry

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