Yesterday, I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life.
Let me set the scene for you all. It was a rainy day in South Florida and as a post-grad 22-year-old living at home, I have little to no options when it comes to making plans with people. With all of my college friends spread across the country, I have relied heavily on hanging out with my parents. I could write an entire blog on how that has been. Yet for now, we’re just talking about yesterday’s atrocious experience.
Due to the rain, my mother wanted an indoor activity to enjoy her Sunday. She suggested we see a movie. As a former film major and fan of jokes about buttcracks, I suggested we see the new movie Joy Ride. That is now my biggest regret in life.
If you don’t know, Joy Ride is a comedy about a group of four female Chinese friends who travel to Beijing for a business trip. Written by two longtime Family Guy writers Cherry Chevapravatdumrong and Teresa Hsiao, Joy Ride is an extremely raunchy comedy that has already garnered comparison to The Hangover. I knew it would be dirty, I figured there would be some sexual stuff, but never could I have imagined how insanely lewd this movie would be.
SPOILER ALERT: Movie details found beyond this point
So what is it that made watching this movie with my mother so unpleasant? Well, for starters it is an all female ensemble, so it is essentially made for women. That doesn’t mean it isn’t funny, though. Bridesmaids and Pitch Perfect are hilarious. The same goes for even more modern female led films like Wine Country. However, Joy Ride isn’t funny in a diarrhea or vomiting way like those other films. This movie is full of everything you pretend doesn’t exist when you are with your mom: drugs, sex, and polygamy.
Towards the beginning of the film, there is a scene in which the group of women need to get rid of a bunch of cocaine while on a moving train. How do they do so exactly? Oh, just by snorting most of it and shoving the rest up their you-know-whats (at least I hope you know what). While extremely funny and right up my alley, that’s not really the thing I want to see while I sit next to a 55-year-old woman who pushed me out of her womb.
What came next was so much worse than drug smuggling. The midpoint of the movie is one of the most sexual sequences of scenes in film history. Through a bunch of intercutting, thrusting, and groaning, we witness three of the four women all have their own form of aggressive sexual behavior. One of the women has sex with former NBA star Baron Davis, which is honestly pretty tame. Another brings two different guys back to her room with her (they show A LOT). And the last one works on herself using a basketball and massage gun. Kinky, I know. Plus, all of this goes down while they’re still high on cocaine. Sitting next to my own mother, all I wanted to do was vanish from this planet never to return again.
Instead, however, I was forced to sit through the remaining 45 minutes of the film. Did it get worse? I’m not sure. Would you consider one of the leads going full-frontal including a close up on her down under “worse?” If so, then yes it does get worse.
While I definitely don’t recommend seeing Joy Ride with your parents, I do suggest seeing the movie. I completely understand The Hangover comparison as this is one of the most wild, vulgar movies to get a theatrical release in the past decade. However, despite its crudeness (which normally I’d love if I weren’t with my birth giver), I don’t think it’s as funny as The Hangover.
It is a hysterical movie that definitely blurs some lines and I’m glad that it was made. Movies nowadays have gotten too soft and I truly believe that the success of this film could change that. If you are a fan of filthy comedies like Ted or We’re The Millers this is right up your alley. Just don’t go with anyone blood-related.
